Wow, the voices were loud last night.

It’s always interesting to go back and re-read what I’ve posted, even just hours later, and see where my perspective is.

In the morning light, things are not so dire and hopeless, as usual. However, I will never apologize for any blog, no matter how emotional or how self-defeating. This is meant as an honest and open view of what’s going on in my life as I move into this third phase of my life and sometimes that is not easy, as you all know. So many times, just writing the words down and getting them out of my head is such a relief. And knowing that there are people out there who will read this and respond in a variety of ways gives me much comfort. It is difficult for me to really show the darker, deeper emotional side sometimes and this blog is the only way I can really let my friends know how I feel.

So today, after almost a full eight hours of sleep (okay, three hours then awake around 3ish, as usual, for a half hour, then another almost five hours), I am feeing a bit rejuvenated. I hope to get much accomplished today after picking my dad up at the hospital around lunchtime.

Mikee suggested 2006 be the year of discovery. For me, 2005 started that and the process definitely will continue through this year, to hopefully reveal a more stable, more sane me with less time being drawn to the dark and more time spent dancing in the light.