Awfully dark blue today. Realizations abounded last night on the drive home, leading to a head full of decisions I don’t want to make but have to. One single choice that is heart-breaking. Wondering how I keep finding myself in this situation. Actually, the choice is not mine, really. I’m just catching up with it. Don’t know how to let this go, don’t know how to get past it but I’ve got to. Lost and wandering today in a sea of sadness, loss of something I had no right to, knowing he won’t miss me, I am no loss. Gonna try to go to the beach today. Maybe the answers are there in the waves.
Listening to “Watching You” by Melissa Etheridge. Truer words never spoken.
3 comments:
Maybe this is the universe telling us it's time to really be on our own, and strong with it. It's not to say we won't have other OOMA's and relationships won't bloom, but maybe the universe is telling us it's time to be strong, independant, and confident in ourselves.
Because let me tell you, I fight with the feeling of loneliness, and the fear that I will never find someone. And I can't believe that's what's planned for me. I refuse to. Because if I start to believe, it'll happen, and I just can't deal with that. No, the right OOMA's are out there. We will find them.
So let the ocean wash away the blues and let it carry you to your center, and know that maybe this is a rough patch, and yeah, it does hurt, of course it hurts, but maybe this is where we wipe the slate clean. Where we can just look at the past, and accept it in all it's stages. And now we can just focus on us, no distractions, just who we are and who we want to be, and how we're gonna do it.
We seem to follow a similar path with OOMA's, I don't know if that's the birthday twin in us or what. But at least we got some support.
I think sitting and listening to the ocean is a great plan.
-Logi-Gal
"strong, independant, and confident in ourselves..."
right on, logi-gal!!!! I think you have the way of it. It sucks sometimes, but perhaps if we believe hard enough it will be different...
You're at the beginning of the new you, so it's no surprise that you have to crawl towards what you want, rather than sprinting towards it.
You can't lose something, if you never found it. What you found is still yours to treasure, so turn the OOMA into an OOMF - F being friendship.
Like begets like, so when you're standing in your own, someone will find the road that leads to your heart, without you needing to plant signs at every turn :>
You deserve it & soon, some He will deserve you!
Post a Comment