Wishing...

I wish I could tear you out of my heart, forget how your eyes looked into mine, how your arms felt around me, how close we almost got.

I wish I could not feel you so often and so strong, like your heart is reaching out to mine, despite your denials, despite your not being able to look me in the eye anymore. Despite the fact that when you do, there is still something there, something sweet, something delicate, that you choose to tear away.

I wish you could be strong enough to stay here, be here, not leave me behind. Be what you said you would be, let us be what we were.

Because I miss talking to you. I miss that. Just that. So simple. Just talking. For hours.

I wish you were more than a season, more than a lesson, more than something ephemeral, something to be lost as a sweet memory, something -- someone -- who happened once.

I wish I could tell you this because I thought I could tell you anything.

And I can’t.

Because I can’t. Because you won’t.

I just wish I could tell you…

… how much I miss you.